Tuesday, 20 December 2011

My Days with Buddy...day 2

I guess this is actually still day 1, but days are feeling like weeks right now, so bear with me.

The syringe feeding began, just as the Doctor ordered.  I am not unaccustomed to such lengths for animals.  I come from a long line of soft-hearted animal lovers.  I well remember my Dad trying to save and rescue wounded or even dead animals.  We once had a gold fish - named Goldie (original, huh!) that was belly up one morning.  I cried and Dad went to work on her.  He filled a glass with warm water and added a pinch of salt.  He then laid the floating fish in the glass and started to give it "artificially respiration" by stroking its gills.  For some reason I, to this day, believe that this little fish came back to life. Not sure if that's a correct memory, or the firm belief in the power of my father.  Needless to say, with that in my past - along with many concussed birds that hit our french door, brought back to health by my Dad, and other such stories, I am a believer in miracles with animals.

Through out the day yesterday I did the feedings.  9:30, 11:30, 1:30, 3:30, 5:30.... every 2 hours.  Alyssa drove to Three Hills to see the little ones, so she helped with the 7:30 feeding while I was at practice.  She found out it was not as easy as one would think.

First of all, Lucy is NOT pleased with this process.

She is a remarkable mother.  At only 2 years old, she has the amazing instincts of an old pro.  She goes into complete panic when I pick Buddy up to feed him.  She cries and nudges my hand with her nose.  She loves me and trusts me, so she doesn't get mad, but she definitely lets me know that this is not what she likes.  It is like she was trying to tell me, "Let me do that!  This is MY job!".

Sorry Luce - it doesn't work that way with this little guy.  I have to help you.

The feedings went like clockwork.  He doesn't like the syringe much - especially when I give just a little too much pressure on the plunger and he gets a bit more than a drop at a time.  But with persistence, things are going well.

Then, we saw it.  Lys noticed it first.  Buddy is latched on to Lucy.

I couldn't believe it!  But there he was, snuggled up close, little paws on either sides of her teats.  He was really sucking.  We watched to make sure that he was swallowing properly, and sure enough, he was doing it.

Lucy looked at me as if to say, "See?  I told you this was my job!", and laid her head down and closed her eyes.

We cried.  We thanked God for His tender care over these "insignificant ones" that are so significant to us.

I was still not convinced that he would completely "get it", and that his big aggressive sisters wouldn't allow him to have his fair share, so throughout the night the feedings continued...2:00, 4:00, 6:00.

At 8 am I was out of formula, so I dragged my very tired self to the kitchen to mix up the milk for the day.  I came into the family room - aka the nursery - and settled onto the floor next to the nest of blankets.

There it was again - Buddy latched on perfectly - and his two sisters nicely tucked under Lucy's front and back legs, keeping an open path for him alone to nurse.

I looked at Lucy and said, "You think you're pretty smart don't you!"  She smiled.  (YES, dogs DO smile) and laid her head down and gave a big sigh.

At that moment, I felt very close to God. Through the life of this new little family I have learned that He takes care of those that He loves, and I know He loves Lucy and her babies...just like He loves me.

I have had some very difficult days the past month or so.  I have been criticized and slandered about the very things in my life that mean the very most.  It has cut me to the core and made me feel hurt, alone and damaged.  Although I have had the support of many wonderful and dear friends, this affirmation this morning - on the floor beside my dear little dog - God spoke to me.

It was like He said, "I'm going to look after you.  I know you are hurt.  I know others are hurting you, but you need to let me feed you.  I will hold the others away.  Trust me.  Good people can help you feel better, but I will do more.  Let me."

Let me.

So I have.  Thank you Father.


Kmarie said...

This was a beautiful post. Very touching. Sorry you have been hurt by others. I am glad God affirmed his love for you and that you are having gorgeous moments of peace and caring.
Wishing you a Merry Christmas! I hope you find even more moments together with your family to feel accepted and nurtured.
Thanks for giving me more inspiration this week!

Bobbi said...

Thanks for sharing that sacred moment with us. must get a kleenex now.

The Tea Bag said...

I have been praying for you for a month. I am so glad that you and Buddy have each other ... and that you know God loves you and God.Is.For.You. Take the formula in tiny doses every two hours, if that's how He's feeding you right now (possibly you couldn't digest much more of it right now anyway!) and He will nourish your heart and your soul.

Much love to you, Sheila.

just sayin' said...

made me cry! just beautiful! Love you!