Monday, 24 October 2011

coming home

in a funk...
down in the dumps...
singin' the blues...
depressed...

all of the above.

I admit it - I have been on a bit of a pity trip lately.  Suitcase packed full of fear, frustration, need for vengeance, anxiety, tears, angry words, bitter thoughts...  Hardly space in there for anything else.

Well, it's time to come home.   I have seen the sights of that deep dark place, bought a few souvenirs, and have just decided that I have had enough.  It hasn't been a pleasant trip, as you can imagine, but I really need to get back to that good place in my life.

I thought that I had no control over "things" in my life.  That's simply not true.  I figured out that the "things" are monsters because of my choice to make them that in my life.  My attitude is what controls the effect those things have on me.

So, tonight, as I climb off the jet of wallowing, I am choosing to alter my attitude and many of my actions.

How?, you ask...

Well... here are a few things on the list...

* take better care of body (get back to Curves, start going to Fitness Friendsy, eat more thoughtfully, take my vitamins, follow doctor's orders, slow down and take some deep breaths)

* take better care of my mind (shut off the TV, cut back on Facebook - especially the places that are destroying me inside out, read more)

* take better care of my family  (be less distracted, tell them how much I love them, pray for them, give more time to them)

* take better care of my soul  (pray much more, worry much less, spend more time figuring out what God is saying rather than what I am feeling, notice God in the moments of my life and give Him credit when I do)

I do have some specific goals, but I'm too chicken to be that transparent to the world wide web.  Let's just say that I plan to get noticed for the changes that I really want to make.

So, here we go...the flight has just touched down and we are taxi-ing to the terminal.  I can hardly wait to get my feet on the ground of home...





Thursday, 13 October 2011

these are the best of times, these are the worst of times...



pretty much sums up these days of my life.  It seems like there are many things happening all at once - some good, but too many...well, not so good.  There have been moments where curling up in the fetal position seems like a really good idea -
but then I realize that this solution is really no solution at all.  


The past three weeks have been...challenging... in so many ways.  
financial - family - health ... all taking a bit of a hit. 


 - fear - anxiety  - frustration...seem to be the easiest way to deal with it, 


but then I am reminded by things like this...




be still...


uffda - that is very hard for me.  I like to fix and fuss and fight.  Being still is not in my nature. 


Today when I was having some quiet moments (well...the room was quiet - my spirit was pretty much having a 2 year old's temper tantrum) I heard this song start to play on my playlist from my computer.  


It is written and sung by a friend that attended PBI a few years back.  These words were a welcomed sigh to my restless spirit.  




video

...for I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. 
 Plans to give you a hope and a future...
Jeremiah 29:11